Thursday, September 18, 2014

It's been a year...

I have always been an emotional creature. I cry when I see something inspirational, something upsetting. I cry when I'm sad, angry, tired, happy, confused. I don't yell. If I raise my voice it makes me cry. Crying has always been my release. Why do I do this? I DON'T KNOW.

You guys, I used to think I was crazy.

My inner circle knew how emotional I am of course, but when it came to the rest of the world it was my ugly secret. I felt embarrassed that I couldn't keep myself together. I thought I was broken.

Myke has helped me become more open about myself as a human. How did he do this?

By just loving me as I am.

He's not frightened by my tears. He will LITERALLY get in my face and st
are at me until I look at him. That's another defense of mine. If I'm upset I don't like to make eye contact or be touched cause it's easier for me to control my tears. He knows this and will do everything to shake me. It's transformative. It makes me so uncomfortable and stupidly frustrated that I usually end up laughing. He never gets upset at my emotions or tears, only when I try to hide them or shove them down and ignore them.

Because of his fearlessness in the face of my ugly crying face we have mature conversations about what's upsetting us. This helps quell dumb fights because we literally talk about everything. Also, it has helped me be more myself with the world. The girls at work knew UP FRONT how fragile I am and have refrained from sending me heart wrenching stories without a warning. This thing that I used to hide, stress about is know just a fact.

I am emotional.
My name is Lauren.
I'm 25.
I've been dating Myke for a year. Oh yeah, fact.

So, you basically just read a huge love letter to my boyfriend. Here's a not so thinly veiled one.

Thank you for being hands down an A+ human and a rockstar on the accordion. I've never met any one like you in my whole life and I'm grateful that you're okay with me never wanting to let you go. You consistently inspire me, motivate me, and support me.
So gushy.

Until Next Time,
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