Tuesday, May 26, 2015

FAT

I've become a girl obsessed with being comfortable in her own skin. A big part of that for me is owning every adjective that I am. For the last few years when I describe myself, "fat" is one of the first adjectives I reach for. People sometimes recoil and ask me why I said that or try to dissuade me from using that word. "Fat" is one of the dirtiest words a girl can use.

I am reclaiming that word. Being fat once held so much shame for me. Fat used to be an all encompassing word in my life. My face is pretty, but I'm fat. I'm cute for a fat girl. I may not sexy ('cause I'm fat), but at least I'm a good kisser. I couldn't be anything more or less than that word.

Now when I describe myself fat is still in the mix. That's because I am fat. Aaaaaand moving on, I'm also stunning, hilarious, creative, kind, sexy, fashionable, smart, witty, sarcastic, fun loving, adventurous, and so so much more. An adjective I'm working on adding to my line up is healthy, another one of those controversial words. The reason why I want to work on being healthy is not specifically to lose weight, but because I love my body and I would like it to last. I want to treat my body as well as I treat my heart and mind. But that's a different blog. Something I've been doing lately is when I find myself focusing on my outside, I try to turn that inward. What can I do for my soul today? Sometimes that's writing, going for a walk, singing a song, dancing, laughing, or reading some news.

The main point is, there's no wrong way to have a body. You may be thin, thick, fat, flabby, firm, wobbly, jiggly, muscular, strong, heavy, light, solid. You are perfect. I do not care what you look like. I do not care if your skin is clear or your body svelt or where you buy your clothes. Are you happy? Are you loving? Are you free? Self love to me is loving what you've got - all of it. At every stage, phase, and age - love yourself. Your body is such a glorious thing. It recharges you while you sleep, it carries you throughout the day, it pumps your blood, it keeps you alive even when you're berating it and being cruel. Our bodies are such beautiful things.

 
Until Next Time,
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