Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Let's Talk About Sex - Lady Edition

I feel like if you've made it this far past the title I shouldn't need a disclaimer, but I'm all about warning people. If you continue to read about the jump, you will find answers to my top 5 vagina related questions. The myths are things that I once thought as a young woman and since have done research to discover the truth. Maybe you've always wondered some of these things, but like me were too shy to ask.


  • Myth: All vaginas look like the diagrams in your biology book varying only based on the color of your skin.
  • Truth: Vaginas come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. The main difference in how your downstairs could look will be in your labia. Your lips could be short, long, different lengths from each other. Some women have a tight labia that stays tucked in, others have long lips like petals on a flower. They can range in color from light pastel pink to dark brown. Clitorises come in different sizes as well much like a man's penis. When some women get aroused, their clitoris grows significantly, while other women's do not. Just like there is no wrong way to have a body, there is no wrong way to have a vagina.

  • Myth: The first time you have penetrative sex there is a membrane that will be ripped (aka your cherry pops) so bleeding is normal and expected. You should also expect it to hurt.
  • Truth: When I was younger I thought that my hymen was a thin membrane that went over my vagina and needed to be "popped" during sex or when you first put a tampon in. In reality, the hymen does not go over the vagina completely, but just covers a portion of it. The first time it is penetrated, it just needs to be stretched. If you have a little bleeding, your hymen has been torn. To avoid this: go slow and make sure your lubricated. This goes for tampons, fingers, dildos, anything. This is also the same advice if you haven't had anything in there for a while, your hymen will ebb back to it's original position. Your hymen will always be a part of your body, it's not something you can lose.

  • Myth: Too much sex will make you loose or stretch you out.
  • Truth: You've heard it, the "hotdog in a hallway" reference. It's completely false. If you're sexually active and your hymen is stretched back then it might be easier to have sex but it won't feel loose. Vaginal musculature is elastic, meaning it naturally contracts and resumes its normal size and shape, both after sexual intercourse as well as childbirth. If a woman feels "too tight" during sex it usually means that her body is not fully aroused. It can take anywhere from 10-30 minutes of fore play for a woman's body to be ready. Aging can affect tightness. As women age their estrogen levels diminish, the vaginal walls become thinner and less elastic, so the muscles begin to lose their tautness. Kegel exercises can help tautness. Just like working out any other muscle, it can take some time to see results. Try starting with sets of 10 three times a day, working up to 50 reps.

  • Myth: Your pubic hair is unnecessary/ugly/unhygienic.
  • Truth: You do not have to shave your pubic hair to be clean or sexy. We are taught that unshaven pubic hair is "dirty" if you're a woman. Your hair is there in part to be your vagina healthy! It keeps particles of sweat and bacteria from going inside you and messing things up! The style of pubic hair has changed over the years just like the hair on your head! If you like how it makes you feel to trim, shave, wax, shape do it, but don't believe it's something you have to do.

  • Myth: You need to actively clean your vagina.
  • Truth:Your vagina actively cleans itself already! It has good bacteria that cleans itself already. By using douches or soaps inside of your vag, you can mess up the healthy PH balance and cause yeast infections! Ouch. You can also get UTIs if the soap comes in contact with your urethra. You can wash the outside using warm water just to wash away the sweat. Every vagina smells different and has a scent.


Until Next Time,
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